In my heart I am thy Suitor (poetry mine)

In my heart I am thy suitor.
In my mind I know there is no chance or kind.
Oh, oh, they cry love is blind.
Bind up my wounded heart with thy kindness.
Take away my breath, lead me not to an untimed death.

Thou art the love of mine old age.
Like pink coloured ink on brown parchment.
Thou art the rising sun to my setting sun.
The light that rise before the dawn, when birds begin to sing.

NOW IN SCOTS GAELIC
Ann mo chridhe mise do tòir (bàrdachd mhèinn)

Ann mo chridhe mise do tòir.
Ann m ‘inntinn Tha fios agam nach eil cothrom no seòrsa.
Och, och, tha iad a ‘caoineadh gaoil a tha dall.
A cheangal suas mo chridhe leòn le do chairdeas.
A thoirt air falbh m ‘anail, a’ leantainn orm nach do untimed bàs.

Tusa gràdh mo shean aois.
Like dath pinc air inc dhonn parchment.
Tusa a ‘ghrian ag èirigh gu mo ghrian.
Tha an solas a tha ag èirigh an làthair an camhanaich, nuair a chaidh eòin a ‘tòiseachadh a’ seinn.

Black sheep a story about my life republished

Black sheep of the family & dyslexia a lifetime

As far back as I can remember I have been the black sheep of my family.

Now this is not a pity party it is just the way it is. Ill list the facts & reasons why & you can decided for yourself.

1.) I in no way shape or form conform to members of my father’s side of the family. Who for the most part are down to earth hard working artisans,  mechanics,  and folk from that sort of lifestyle.
These folks qualified in  the usual way after finishing school and going on to complete the required qualifications in their field’s of interest.

The people from my mother’s side of the family are more intellectuals and they also happen to be proud people who do not accept into their ranks new family members who are odd or different with very few exceptions.

The exception been the family of my aunt Estele Swart and uncle Trevor Swart, who have always accepted me without reserve and for this I am forever thankful.
Further the members of my mothers family competed school and went on to qualify in their fields of interest at university and then out to make their fortunes.

My father left school at an early age because he needed to support his family (the only book I ever saw him read was his Bible).

I AM A DYSLEXIC THANK GOD FOR MS SPELL CHECK

Now having given the broad outline let me begin to deal with specifics.

Because of my particular disability (dyslexia coupled with & not bragging a high IQ & frustrated by a world of discrimination against people with disabilities.) Life in general has not been easy because earning or trying to earn a living,  having a secure place in the world has never been easy. I would ask you to imagine if you will a world where you are discriminated against because of something you cannot do because of your disability, every job interview you go to you are turned away because of a failure to be able to communicate 100% correctly in a written format, Because you look normal nobody thinks there is anything wrong with you other than you are lazy and don’t want to find a job or work at a career.

Nobody knows the pain of been rejected like a dyslexic be cause you can’t read, because you don’t or cannot apply the rules of grammar correctly, because your By &D’s are  something reversed because I,   a, e, u, o, y, are interchangeable and you can’t tell the differences.

Someone said not so long ago that dyslexics are manipulative and will always try and manipulate a situation to their advantage, this is true only because life the universe and the non mutants have made us so. Because in forcing dyslexic to live on the edges of society you (collectively) have made us self-reliant and hard to the suffering of others and determined to make the best of life that we can.

In doing this we who have lived and live among the normal people have to hide certain things which we are ashamed of because we are embarrassed by what we have had to do to survive in society adapted  to change,  carried resentment around in our hearts all our days because we know that had society not placed academic requirements above the human element we would have achieved so, so much more on a leave playing field.

One of the most annoying things for me personally when I mention that I am dyslexic is the very next person will say or comment with “so am I” (funny thing about been dyslexic is you learn at an early age how to spot a bullshiter after all we are past masters bullshitters).

The point of this is right now everyone and their dog is climbing on the dyslexia bandwagon and admittedly it is about time something was done for the young dyslexics so that they can be part of a normal society, however this is only a part of the problem for more than 40 years I have personally lived the life of a dyslexic and have had to do a lot of the things described above with no help from society. Mark well that I am not talking about handouts but rather constructive steps to correct the injustice of the past against countless real dyslexic’s who have been discriminated against.

When placed in school’s for special needs children which in the 1970’s we we’re promised jobs as artisans I.e builders, carpenters, Metalworks etc, these jobs were never forthcoming our qualifications meant nothing, unacceptable to the job market both artisan and administrative very few options were available thus a lifetime of deception, manipulation was begun  for many years I drifted from one job to the next, frustrated by the wasted time spent at repetitive task which meant absolutely nothing in the long run I developed a lot of hobbies to keep me mind occupied (admittedly I am not the normal type of dyslexic, I became interested in history, art, music, composition, writing, violin making, model ship building, invention, innovation and have invented various types of green devices including a recyclable candle maker (yes it works, it is green energy compliment and could have been invented when the candle was originally invented but I guess normal people don’t understand half the uses of things they invented can be used for.)

I have watched people with learning disabilities and have wondered how it is possible.

People are like computers.

Some are like the old does based PC’s that could only do so much.
Others are like the old 386’s good for windows 3.11.

With a few who are like 386’s with crossover facilities that could run Windows 95.
Thus it confines upwards.

Occasionally there is a bit of software that is written for a later computer but will actually run on a lower level pc, it’s the same with humans.
That is the way it is it’s just life.

In the future will this age be remembered as the age that humans sat and looked at and worked on imagery windows?

As usual I well come debate, comments and discussion.

Self Published works by this  author are available  at lulu.com Click Here http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/sarejess

Posted from WordPress for Android

In the Lord of the rings Simgol calls the golden ring his precious. An all consuming greed fills him to have it, he wants it. Anyone who sees it wants it only one hobbit who is pure of heart can carry it to the fires of destruction without been affected by it’s power.

I know a man in his 8th decade who carries a gold coin minted in the times of the Maccabees who swears his business and personal wealth comes from the possession of this coin. Maybe it does maybe it doesn’t, who knows. The cost of possession of such items comes at a great price Smigol goes to his death in the Moulton lava with the ring.
It would be interesting to see what happens to the man with the coin.

The fear of the blank page or the empty word document is something that all people not only those who write as a proffesion face each time that they sit down to write a post, an email or the proverbial thousand words a day.

A proffesional journalist would have some idea of what they are going to write about their main concern would be finding what I like to call the hook “the hook means that one headline that sums up the story.

Operation Blackout a world war 2 safety mechanism for stopping 21st Century Terrorism

During the blitz and the Battle of Briton it was required of everyone to cover up the windows to make it more difficult for the German bombers t poo drop their payload of death on Britain’s population.

If the same principal was applied to cities and countries that suffer a terror attack like the resent attacks in France, would it not make sense to apply the same principal as mentioned above with slight variations I.e. total shutdown of the media for the period required to apprehend the guilty, and deprive the terrorist organisations, the opportunity of using the shock and fear generated by the attacks as a tactic to  gather support for their cause.
Secondly, all communication other than emergency services to be shut down to prevent the news spreading across social media, and deprive the terrorist using this as a tool to spread their message.

Allow internal communication but international communications must be none existent.

The reasons for this act mentioned above can be used in another far effective way by cutting off communication you are not only stopping the fear factor, but also knowing that terrorism will still try and get the message our will allow the security forces to pin point the attempts made by the terrorists to communicate there actions internationally,  and help to quickly apprehend the guilty.

Parc  chapitre un

Le Sterley du parc d’Oakland dans le comté de Surrey avait pendant longtemps été noblesse distinguée le premier Sterley à lever à la noblesse était monsieur John ayant été dans le service de la Reine Continue reading “”

Short story

I found it washed on to the beach on the incoming tide, one morning after a stormy night on which the wind had blow a gale.
The wind had howled around the lighthouse rattling all the shutters  the oil lamp had been primed in the early afternoon the day before as the clouds began to build over the hills to the north. By 4pm the wind had begun to rise and the ran began to fall the light had faded and I lit the lamp the shuttles began there rotation the strong light beam cast itself out into the driving rain and dark occasionally the lightening flashed and the sound of thunder rumbling long after the flash of lighting had disappeared.
In I was looking out of the window and saw the ocean with 12 foot high waves and swells in which no boat could live in seas like this I thought and I prayed that we would not have to launch the boat that night.

I settled down to read a book besides the fire and drink a glass of brandy to warm my chilled body.
Life as a lighthouse guard was not easy.

I began read and grew comfortable besides the fire and soon fell into a doze.

Soon I was fast asleep I began to dream, I dreamed I was on the quarterdeck of a ship in the storm.

The ship was in trouble and most of the sails had been torn to shreds, the main mast was the only one left standing both the fore mast and quarterdeck mast had gone by the boards. The captain had given orders that the ship was to be abandoned. I clasped the small golden love locket of my wife in Port Elizabeth had given me and kissed it before climbing onto  the life boat.

The waves we’re huge the night dark, with high seas running in the far distance the flash of Cape Reciffe lighthouse caught my eye.

We pulled hard on the oars to get away from the sinking ship when she went down if we were to close she would take the lifeboat down with her and us in it.

For a moment the ship tillted like a crazy milk bucket and then she was gone. A moment later the lifeboat was sucked under.

I felt the air been pulled from my lungs, the heavy coat pulled me down the cold ocean water began freezing my limbs as I struggled to free myself from the heavy coat
Some thing struck me and I remembered no more…

I awoke with a start the fire had gone out and the storm abated. I wondered down to the beach to see how things looked as I walked along the beach the soft wet sand under feet something caught my eye a small golden love locket.